It happened one night

[danzanelfuoco]

Fandom: One Piece

Ship: Zoro/Sanji

Challenge: COW-T #10, week 5, m4 

Prompt: Chat fic 

 

Note: Modern!Au

Shitty cook

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? 01.04

Marimo 

What? 01.07

Shitty cook 

Nothing, they just waved 01.07

Marimo

Oh. 01.08

Shitty cook

Do you sea what I did there?  01:08

Marimo 

No 01.10

Shitty cook 

I’m shore you did. 01.10

Marimo

How do you have friends O.o  01.10

Shitty cook

I’m funny 01.11

And OMG you know hot to use emoticons? 01.11

* how 01.11

Marimo 

No you’re not. 01.11

* and I’d call that a Freudian slip 01.12

‘Cause you know I’m hot as fuck! 01.12

Shitty cook

Shut up! 01.13

Marimo 

Then stop texting me weird stuff so late at night 01.13

Stupid cook 01.14

Shitty cook 

You are replying. 01.14

Marimo

… 01.15

Shitty cook

Wanna hang out? 01.15

Marimo 

What? 01.15

Like now? 01.15

It’s late 01.15

Shitty cook 

Not that late 01.16

And you are awake 01.16

Marimo 

Where? 01.21

Shitty cook

I’ll send you the location. Use Google maps this time. Don’t get lost. 01.21

Shitty cook 

You are lost, aren’t you? 02.00 

Marimo

I am not. 02.00

Shitty cook

It was a ten minutes walk. 02.01

It’s been forty minutes 02.01

Marimo 

I am not lost.  02.02

Shitty cook

Yeah, sure 02.02 

Marimo 

Fuck off 02.03

Marimo 

Where the fuck are you? 02:34 

I swear, if you dragged me out of bed to bring me to this fancy ass pub 02.35

And you are home… 02.35

02.36 

* You have an income calling. From: Shitty cook *

02.37

* You have an income calling. From: Shitty cook *

02.38

* You have an income calling. From: Shitty cook * 

Marimo 

How the fuck do I pick up a call from this app?! 02.38

Yeah, yeah, I got it, I’ve seen you, now stop calling  02.39

Shitty cook

🙄 02.40 

04.37 

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

04.38 

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

04.39 

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

04.40

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

04.41 

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

04.42

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

Marimo
Come on, Sanji. 04.43

Pick up this damn phone 04.43

04.44

* You have an income calling. From: Marimo *

Marimo

I’m sorry, ok 04.45 

Really sorry 04.45

I wasn’t trying to make fun of you  04.46 

I didn’t think you would say something like that seriously 04.46

I can see you visualizing my messages and not replying, you know? 04.47

Shitty cook 

Drop it 04.47

Marimo 

No 04.47
We need to talk about it 04.47

Shitty cook

No, seriously. 04.48

Drop it. 04.48 

Pretend I didn’t say anything. 04.49 

We both drank to much 04.49 

Marimo

You didn’t drink at all 04.50 

And you know I wasn’t even near my limit 04.50

Shitty cook 

Why are you like this? 04.51

Marimo

Like what? 04.51

Shitty cook

You have to humiliate me, right? 04.52

You can’t just pretend it never happened, can you? 04.52

Allow me to leave with some dignity 04.52 

 

Marimo 

You took me by surprise 04.53

That’s all 04.53

But seriously 04.53

You needn’t leave 04.53

Shitty cook

If you don’t stop immediately  04.54

I’m gonna block you 04.54

Marimo 

You didn’t even give me a chance to reply 04.54

Shitty cook 

I know tact is not your forte 04.55

I got it 04.55

You laughing was replying enough 04.55

Marimo

No, shit 04.56

 * You can no longer send messages to Shitty cook * 

I like you too  04.56

 * You can no longer send messages to Shitty cook * 

You took me by surprise 04.57

 * You can no longer send messages to Shitty cook *

 

I’ve been pining over you for centuries 04.58

 * You can no longer send messages to Shitty cook * 

I never thought you would confess and it not be a joke 04.58

 * You can no longer send messages to Shitty cook * 

Sanji, please! 04.59 

* You can no longer send messages to Shitty cook * 

Witch

Zoro, would you care explain? 15.17

Zoro

Explain what? 15.22

Witch 

Why I don’t have a functional chemistry partner for the assigned project? 15.23

Zoro

The shitty cook? 15.23

Witch

Yes, him 15.24

We had to meet at 15 and he’s been staring out of the window  15.25 

moping  15.25

for almost half an hour now  15.26

Tell me why I’m waisting my Sunday 15.26

Zoro 

What did he tell you? 15.27

Witch

Nothing! 15.27

That’s the point! 15.28 

He just mopes and says 15.28 

I quote 15.28 

‘It’s nothing’ 15.29 

All I got is that he didn’t sleep well because he hung up with you till late hours 15.29

And of course that can’t be it 15.29 

At least not all of it 15.29 

What the fuck happened? 15.30 

Zoro

Well, we did hang up yesterday 15.31

Witch

And? 15.31 

Zoro 

Nothing! 15.31
He just 15.32

Witch

Don’t bullshit me 15.32

Zoro 

Kinda  15.32

Confessed to me 15.32

Witch

FINALLY! 15.33

Wait, why is he sulking then? 15.33 

Zoro

I may or may not 15.34

Haven’t take him seriously  15.34

Witch

WHAT? 15.34
WHY? 15.34
WHY ON EARTH?  15.35

WHY WOULD YOU BE SO STUPID???????????  15.35 

Zoro

I dunno, ok?  15.35 

I dunno.  15.36

He was just smiling, you know, he was there and smiling, charming and flashing and then he leaned and he told me he could ‘get used to spend his nights with me’, like some cheap and cheesy pickup quote, and then I said something along the lines of ‘why would he’ because my brain wasn’t there, okay? My brain wasn’t there. And he said it was because he liked me and I laughed.  15.40 

I laughed. 15.40 

Shit. 15.41 

But can you blame me? 15.41 

Come on, Nami, you’ve seen him   15.41 

Mr Ladies’ man?   15.41 

Liking my gay ass?  15.42 

It had to be a joke.  15.42 

So I laughed because I didn’t want him to know shit.    15.42 

Like yes, you are joking, ah ah ah, no way I’m totally in love with you, ah ah ah  15.43 

And it turns out he was serious!  15.43 

Fuck 15.43 

FUCK 15.43 

He just left and I tried to follow  15.44 

But I got lost 15.44 

Then I tried to call him.  15.44 

And he didn’t pick up 15.44 

He blocked my messages  15.44 

Witch

I. Just. Can’t.  15.45 

You two are incredible! 15.45 

For fuck’s sake, is this a joke?  15.45 

How could you screw up something like this?   15.45 

No.  15.46 

Don’t answer me. 15.46 

I’m gonna send you the location of a place I know.  15.46 

USE GOOGLE MAPS! 15.46 

Be there by the five.  15.47

I’m gonna bring Sanji  15.47 

And then you two sort this mess out. 15.47 

Zoro

Why would you? 15.50 

Witch

Because I need a good mark for this damn exam 15.51 

I’ve been on the phone almost half an hour and Sanji didn’t even notice!  15.51 

See what you’re doing to his mental stability! 15.52 

… 15.52 

And then you owe me 15.52 

BE FUCKING THERE IN TIME  15.52 

Nami 

Hey! 15.59
How’s it going? 15.59 

I had an interesting conversation with Sanji and Zoro this afternoon and I was wondering…

Did you happen to say something to Sanji the other day? 16.00 

Robin 

And did this interesting conversation of yours involved the blooming of a new relationship? 16.01 

Nami 

I am not sure yet. 16.02 

That was why I was asking 16.02 

Robin 

Oh  16.04 

This surprises me. 16.04 

Nami

What did you exactly told Sanji?  16.05 

Robin

Nothing specific.  16.06 

I just made an observation that our resident swordsman is growing a strong fanbase, his matches are starting to get crowded  16.06 

That probably the fact that he’s shirtless during the competitions may attire people for reasons different than mere fascination for the sport  16.07 

And I may have suggested that if I had a crush on him I would make my move before Zoro could find interesting the company of another person. 16.08 

Not that explicitly of course. 16.08 

Nami

Of course 16.09 

Robin 

What happened then? 16.09 

Nami

Well, you know those two. 16.10 

Basically Sanji threw himself at Zoro and Zoro panicked 16.10
Could you believe it? 16.10 

Now Sanji thinks Zoro is the most homophobic jock in history. 16.10 

Robin

That’s ludicrous. 16.11 

Nami

My point.  16.11 

Now I’m tricking Sanji into going out to take his mind out of the situation 16.11 

(Situation that I got from Zoro, because Sanji won’t tell me shit)  16.12 

And I sent the location to Zoro so that he would come and talk to Sanji 16.12 

Because honestly, this is getting ridiculous. 16.12 

So I was wondering… 16.12 

Could you… 16.13 

I don’t know?  16.13
send Franky to check on him?  16.13 

Like, make sure Zoro is there on time? 16.13 

Robin

Yes, I think that would be for the best.  16.14 

Keep me updated 16.14 

Nami 

Sure thing  16.14 

Robin

Franky’s on his way 16.43 

He’ll make sure Zoro won’t get lost. 16.43 

Nami 

Thnx a lot 16.51 

We’re on our way, too 16.51 

Tangerine:

🎉🎉🎉 You owe me 10 berries 🎉🎉🎉 20.20 

Captain Sniper 

Are you sure? 20.23 

Tangerine

I was there 😏 20.23 

Captain Sniper 

REALLY?   20.24
WHAT HAPPENED?!?!?!?!   20.24 

20.24 

* You have an income calling. From: Tangerine  *

Shitty cook (Sanji) 

Water you doing? 00.12 

Marimo 💚

Please  00.12 

Don’t 00.12 

Shitty cook (Sanji)

Hey, no need to be a beach  00.12

Marimo 💚

Why me?  00.13

Shitty cook (Sanji) 

Shell I stop then?   00.13

Marimo 💚

😖  00.13 

Shitty cook (Sanji) 

Ok, then   00.14 

I won’t sand anymore message  00.14 

Marimo 💚

Wait were you for real?  00.27 

Shitty cook (Sanji)

🤐 00.27 

Marimo 💚

OMG I can’t believe I’m really about to do this 00.31 

Shitty cook (Sanji)

🤨 00.32 

Marimo 💚

What did one volcano say to the other volcano? 00.33 

Shitty cook (Sanji)

?  00.33 

Impress me 00.34

Marimo 💚

I lava you  00.35 

Shitty cook (Sanji) 

OMG that was terrible 😂 00.35 

Marimo 💚

I know.  00.36 

Shitty cook (Sanji) 

I love you too.  00.36