A place you never knew was empty

 Fandom: Blue Exorcist

Ship: Rin Okumura/Ryuuji “Bon” Suguro

Rating: Safe

Challenge: COW-T, w3, m1

Prompt: Neonato

Wordcount: 2000 parole 

 

 

 

A baby fills a place in your heart that you never knew was empty

To say that Bon was irritated may have been a euphemism. 

He knew Rin would never be on time, but still… couldn’t he show a little respect for his partner, just once in his life?

Ryuuji fidgeted with his earring, trying to soothe away the anxiety. 

He knew that it was similar to the Blue Night only in appearances, that no one had died.

It didn’t mean anything. 

It didn’t mean Satan was involved. 

It probably was a fire demon, something Rin could slash and Bon could chant away.

Except a temple had been burned and Ryuuji wasn’t feeling confident as usual. 

He just wished Okumura would arrive so that they could go in and be over with this. 

Bon checked his cell phone to make sure he hadn’t received some text. 

No chance. 

Damn. Oh, screw Rin and screw Okumura-sensei for pairing them together. 

Bon was going in. 

“Be careful,” the fireman told him, “the fire is out, but the structure might collapse at any moment.” 

Bon acknowledged him and left him behind the containment tape. 

The door frame was empty, hinges hanging uselessly in its sides and the floor was so full of debris - charred chunks of the wooden planks that used to be the roof before the burning - that Bon had to sidestep them in a complicated path, instead of walking the perimeter as per protocol. 

It didn’t look like there was something amiss. Maybe it had just been a short circuit that had set the fire to the building. It was an ancient temple, after all, the electrical system probably wasn’t under regulation. 

He was almost finished with the check-in the main room and then he would head to the second and last one, where the sacred altar was kept, access allowed only to the priests. 

See? He didn’t need Rin. 

He could have gone in at the scheduled time alone, instead of waiting for him for half an hour and then just do it on his own anyway. 

The crack over his head made him look up, but not fast enough. With a wail, the wood splintered and fell. Too surprised to move, Bon looked helplessly at his death - or at least, at his very painful maiming - then closed his eyes and waited for the impact. 

An impact that never came. 

Rin’s sword had cut the board, the two halves falling with a crash at their sides, leaving them unscathed. 

“BON!” Rin turned to him, sheathing Kurikara. “You could have died! Why didn’t you wait for me?”

 “You were late. I’m not your damn baby sitter!” 

“I’m your partner!” 

 “Yes, and I’m yours! Would it kill you to acknowledge it by being in time? It’s a question of respect!” 

“I do respect you!”

 “If you did, you wouldn’t leave me waiting for you for hours!” 

“I’m sorry!” 

 “And that makes it up how exactly?”

“Well, I don’t know! What do you want me to do?”

 “Being on time, for Christ’s sake!” 

Rin hissed at the name and in the distance, a child started crying. 

 “Was it really necessary? You know it hurts!”

 It had been a slip of his tongue, Bon hadn’t thought how it would affect his demonic partner, but he still didn’t want to apologize. “Well, maybe now you know how I feel!” 

“Oh, yes, but, me being late doesn’t physically hurt you!”

“It doesn’t? What if a demon attacks and you aren’t here to have my back?”

Rin was taken aback. He hadn’t thought about it like that. But he was here, right? He had just saved Bon from the falling ceiling. 

“You can trust me to have your back!”

 “No, I can’t! Because you’re always late!” 

 “And you are always angry and shouting! Look you even made a kid cry!” 

That froze them.

“A… kid?” Asked Bon bewildered, as he turned to the source of the noise. “What is it even doing a child here?” 

Rin looked as surprised as him. “Could it be a trap?” 

“Perhaps. We need to be careful.”

But they just run to the other room - the secluded one where the altar was laid - jumping over the rubbles, protocol forgot in favor of what could be a possible new treat or a civilian to save. 

To their surprise, the sancta sanctorum wasn’t half as bad as the entrance of the temple. At least it didn’t look like they would die very soon, even though flames had had their ways with the tapestries. 

And in the middle of the chaos, a newborn baby just laid on the top of the altar, stark naked and unarmed, not even dirty with ashes. 

“He doesn’t look dangerous,” Rin said, and as soon as he spoke, the baby stopped crying. 

“Looks like he likes your voice,” Bon considered. 

“Of course, he does! I’m the best with children!” Rin prided himself even if he had never had any experience. “Am I not, cutie?” He turned to the child. 

The baby smiled, wiggling his toes, and then blue flames erupted from his head. 

Bon widened his eyes. “Oh, fuck!” 

“Oh, no! No! Don’t even think about it!” 

“But Yukio!”

 “I said no!” The younger Okumura put his feet down. This couldn’t be happening. Not again. He already had his share of demonic brothers, he wouldn’t do it another time. 

 “It’s our brother!” 

 “It’s Satan’s son!” 

 “So am I!” He said, leaving out the “and so are you” still on the tip of his tongue. 

 “That’s different!” Yukio replied. 

 “How so?”

“You are twenty and perfectly capable of controlling your flames even with Kurikara unsheathed. He’s a newborn baby with demonic powers and we don’t have any holy blade in which to seal them.”

 “I won’t leave him to the Vatican! They would kill him!” 

“You don’t know for sure!” 

“It’s a risk I’m not willing to take.” 

“But I am.” 

Rin didn’t just look hurt, he looked on the verge of tears. 

Even Bon took a step back.

“You… you… you are not our father’s son!” Rin spat out. “Father Fujimoto would never, never...” 

“He was ready to kill us!”

 “Yes, and he didn’t!” 

“Because he had other ways. Ways we don’t have while the Vatican does. Be reasonable, Rin!” 

 “Fuck reasonable, Yukio!”

 “Yeah, it’s always like that with you! I am the bad guy just because I use logic! Why can’t you ever think with your head instead of your heart? You have just been cleared of charges and set free from constant surveillance - surveillance of which I was the main caretaker. I’m done, Rin. I can’t do another twenty years of this shit. 

“Fine! Then I’ll be his caretaker!”

“What-?!”

“You just said it: I’ve been cleared of charges, I’m not a menace. I can take care of my brother!”  

“You don’t even know where to start!”

“I’ll help him,” Bon intervened and snatched them out of their fight. 

“What?!” Rin’s jaw almost fell to the floor. He didn’t even look like he remembered Bon was already in the room. 

“Are you sure, Suguro?” Yukio looked at him as if he had grown another head,

Bon was not sure, he hadn’t been less sure in his entire life, but… 

It was the right thing to do.

The Vatican would never leave the child to Rin alone, but with Bon... he was the perfect choice to look after both of Satan’s sons. 

“Yes,” Bon nodded. “I’m sure.” 

In the end, they had to stay in the deserted old dormitory, the same where Yukio and Rin lived in the days of the True Cross Academy. 

At least, they didn’t have to share the room with Yukio but had a new floor assigned. 

Bon poured a cup of coffee from the freshly prepared - by Rin - breakfast and sat dumbly at the table, too tired for the lack of sleep. Why had he ever thought this was a good idea? The child sure was the son of Satan, sent on Earth to torture him with his nocturnal cries. 

Why? He asked himself again, then glanced at his new roommates. 

“Oh, look at you!” Rin, sprawled on the carpet with the baby, giggled at him, taking his little hands in his “Aren’t you the cutest little brother ever?” Oh yes, yes, you are!” 

Yes, that was the answer, Bon realized for the umpteenth time, looking at the picture they made. 

You’ll make a perfect wife, he remembered mocking Rin when he found out about his cooking skills, but now the sentence resonates in his head in a more serious way.

 

Bon blushed at the thought. How I want you to be my perfect wife. 

Oh, fuck. 

Fuck.

Bon had fallen so badly. 

They were playing the happy family. And, actually, Rin was really happy. 

Too happy. 

He had to remind himself this wasn’t real, that soon Bon would realize this farce was foolish and would leave them both as everyone had always left him. Rin told himself that ‘till that moment, he could enjoy life as it was, even if it was just a pretense. 

But Rin wasn’t really a good waiter and, as it turned out, that moment wasn’t coming any time soon, so the Blue Exorcist had grown impatient. 

“What is even wrong with you?” asked Bon one day, fed up with his attitude. 

Shiro was almost six months and finally learning to sleep at night. Bon felt like he was in heaven and couldn’t really understand what was bothering Rin. 

“When are you gonna leave?” 

Bon’s heart plummeted to his stomach. “Excuse me?!” 

Why hadn’t seen this coming? Had Rin got to resent him and his interference? Did he want to be alone with his brother, without his constant presence? Was Rin gonna break up with him? - No, what was he even thinking, they weren’t together! - And if so, could he still see Shiro, maybe at the weekends? 

“I know you’re gonna tire of us eventually,” Rin stated bluntly, ignorant of Bon internal panicking, “I just want to know when so that I can prepare. I hate not knowing.” 

Rage took over Bon. “You think I am gonna tire of you? And where on Earth did this idiot thought came from?!”

“You never could stand me, we fight almost every day and you don’t have a life anymore, outside this!” 

“And just because of that you think I’m gonna abandon my family?” Bon snapped, “You two are my life now!”

 Rin looked taken aback. “I don’t think you phrased that the right way. You almost sound like…” 

“I know how I phrased it, and don’t suppose to know what’s going on in my head. If you want me to leave, then you have to say it, but don’t put the blame on me, you coward!” 

Rin could have snapped at the ‘coward’, Bon expected him to, instead he just looked lost. 

“I don’t want you to leave,” he admitted, “ever. And I’m scared you will.” 

Bon felt his rage deflating. 

“I won’t. I - I was serious. You two are my family, I don’t need anything else. Why would you even…?”

Rin looked away. 

“Marry me,” Bon blurted. 

“What?”

“Not romantically!” Bon looked away, embarrassed, “I know you don’t feel the same as I do, but legally… you would be sure I’m committed to staying.” 

“I don’t feel the same as you do?” Rin frowned, almost offended, ”And what do you feel?”

 “Don’t make me say it.”

 “Don’t be a coward.”

“I - I love you.” Bon admitted earnestly, “Both of you. Shiro is practically my son and you… I don’t think I can be without you.”  

“Now, who’s supposing to know what’s going on in my head?!” Rin angrily spat back, “Or do you think I would raise a child with anyone?”

“What -?”

“I love you too, you idiot!” He shouted.

And Bon, stunned, laughed. Because of fucking course, they would argue even while confessing. 

They were both idiots after all.